My Monument

I build it to last
An ominous presence lurks
I am in it now

When I was growing up, I listened to Depeche Mode, whose song Monument stayed with me through the years. I understood it as a reflection on working hard to build something, only to watch it fall apart or be taken away. I thought about those lyrics often, particularly during periods when I found myself in that very situation. It seemed to happen more often than I would have liked.

In some ways, this painting has become a reflection of my own life. Parts of the structure are carefully ordered and polished, as in the marble architecture of ancient Rome. Elsewhere, the forms are irregular and chaotic, yet they still suggest the work of human hands and the time invested in creating. There is an attempt at order, but mostly it is disorderly. it suggests a desire to build something that will endure.

But the structure is made of sand, and the sea is close by. What appears monumental is also fragile. The water offers a quiet, ominous reminder that everything we build is subject to forces beyond our control, and that even our greatest efforts may not last.